Working conditions . . .

Normally I avoid fast food, saving it for the airport or long car rides. I've always known that fast food was evil (except chick-fil-a obviously, which, for those of you with any love for mythology will know, was carried up to Mt. Olympus by doves as a divine exhalation of the planet and eaten by the gods as ambrosia), but if there was any doubt, please examine this hot sauce packet I received from the taco bell here in Dubai the other day . . .

Photos not the best . . . taken with my mobile. Package reads "Help! I can't tell where I am. It's dark and I can hear laughing." I like to think this employee, lets call him Alphonso, at least has some fond memories of sunlight. Taco Bell hot sauce: Cayanne, chipotle peppers, garlic, olive oil, exasperated yearning, dehydrogenated panic, paprika, and red no.2. I got some more hot sauce to try and decipher the location of the tacobell dungeonarium, but they only said things like 'a taco a day keeps the immigration police away'. Sorry Alphonso,

i've failed you.

Guess what my country has that yours doesn't . . .

Thats right! Gold Bar Vending machines! Its brilliant, you go to the machine, insert some spare thousands you found while looking for change under your car seat, and out pops solid gold bars. I found that alot of places here in Dubai still don't actually take gold bars in exchange for goods. No problem though, I found they are still pretty useful to use as weights to help anchor my private floating island. (I used to just fill sacks with the solid embodiment of practicality and good judgement, and then tie them underneath . . . but the gold is so much shinier!) The sparkling makes everything better, except vampires. vampires should not sparkle.

My island isnt pictured here. It sank sadly . . . too many gold bars . . .

Virtual Visit to A&A's Flat

Have you been to Dubai? Probably not! Instead, let me show you where we have lived for the last three years...

View from our windows on the 41st floor. Overlooking Satwa, Jumeriah 1, Al Diyafah Street and the Persian Gulf. You can see the World Islands at the end if you squint.

Outside our front door. A busy section of Sheikh Zayed Road. See the Emirates Towers, the Burj Khalifa, three of WSPs former offices and the new Metro. We live in the Blue Tower.

I shot this clip as part of a "Walk in Our Shoes" iReport on cnn.com. They ended up using my feet in the final product.

I'd show you around our flat but Aaron says we have to clean up first.

Koali gets around

The first post of the new blog! Its just like the last blog, but with half the calories and 100% extra existence! I am still experimenting with adding posts, so in an attempt to explore a bit of the gambit of multimedia posting extravagance, I present a few photos and a home movie of our longest rent paying tenant. His name is Koali and he doesn't do much. He tags along on some travels and gets up to mischief when no-ones in the flat. He doesn't go out much because Dubai is usually too hot for him. Below is an old video of Koali stealing mint leaves from the fridge. I wasn't sure where all my herbs were going so I set up a camera to spy on the place when we were at work. I think he thought they were Eucalyptus leaves.

Here is some assorted Koali pics from some of his travels: New Zealand, Sweden, Hongkong . . . Koali gets around . . . like a record